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In 2006, Wayne Rooney, a 20-year-old forward for Manchester United, signed a £5m contract for five autobiographies to be published in the next 12 years. However, only three books were published as two never materialized. Instead, we received scandalous memoirs from Helen Wood and Jenny Thompson, whom Rooney had an affair with while his wife, Coleen, was pregnant with their first child, Kai. Coleen’s latest book does not shy away from discussing these events, but its main focus is on her legal battle with Rebekah Vardy last year. Vardy had sued for defamation after Coleen publicly accused her on Instagram of leaking stories to the tabloids based on private information only visible to Vardy’s account.

Although the story of the cleverly orchestrated sting never loses its appeal, let’s not ignore the fact that we already know all the intricate details, from Coleen’s ten-point ellipsis to the missing iPhone 12 Pro belonging to Vardy’s agent. The enduring fascination with My Account – a brilliantly titled piece – lies in its honest portrayal of the madness that comes with being married to the most talented English footballer of the century. Coleen reveals the inner workings of a relationship that began in their teenage years, when Wayne sought her assistance with his contact lenses outside their local fish and chip shop in Croxteth. Soon, she becomes the face of Asda clothing and Argos jewelry, while also being featured in Gucci for Vogue. As a young girl, Coleen’s father would bring home their McDonald’s takeaway in a plastic bag to avoid upsetting their less fortunate neighbors; as a young adult, hosting a party could mean hiring not only popular bands like Sugababes or Stereophonics, but also a camel (which surprised and confused her mother and mother’s cousin).

The most honest parts of the text are driven by a sense of domesticity rather than celebrity. In her writing, Coleen reveals that Wayne drinks in order to escape and disappear from the world when his mind becomes overwhelmed. However, this has the opposite effect. After a media frenzy in 2018 caused by a drink-driving incident with another woman, they move to Washington DC for a fresh start. Coleen, feeling isolated, spends her days shuttling her sons to playdates with the children of Swiss diplomats and seeking solace in the pantry of their rented home. Eventually, she is able to attend Wayne’s evening matches by finding a babysitter. She enjoys these nights alone, without any responsibilities or distractions, simply enjoying the game under the night sky with a hotdog and a beer.

Coleen, with the help of Terry Ronald who has also worked on books with Sarah Harding, Will Young, and Bananarama, speaks in a straightforward manner with a dry sense of humor. She is eager to return to the UK for the Christmas holidays and is anxiously waiting for Wayne to come back from a public appearance in Saudi Arabia so they can travel together with their four sons, the youngest being a baby. She notices that his plane has landed, but she doesn’t receive any updates. When he finally calls, she is already feeling tense and he says, “I can’t talk for long. I have been arrested.”

Can you clarify your statement?

“I accidentally accessed a restricted area at the airport by opening a door that was off-limits…”

Kai also keeps his mother on her feet. After a game, he excitedly asks, “Mom, did you see me make that free kick?” She responds with enthusiasm, “Yes, I did!” However, Kai quickly points out that she was actually talking to other parents during the game and he didn’t even score a free kick.

The saying “like mother, like son” applies here. It was revealed that Coleen did not inform Wayne about her Instagram investigation. She believed it would be pointless as he would probably dismiss it and tell her to move on with her life. While Coleen acknowledges her close family and friends, Wayne is only thanked for being a witness in the trial. The dedication to their sons ends with a declaration of love. This shows that Coleen cannot help but be cautious, as the Wagatha drama serves as a warning that she is not easily fooled.

Source: theguardian.com